Aleksander Hardashnakov at 1857

Artist: Aleksander Hardashnakov

Exhibition title: A Hole In The Life

Venue: 1857, Oslo, Norway

Date: March 11 – April 17, 2016

Photography: all images copyright and courtesy of the artists and 1857

A TREE KILLER LIVES HERE. Bits of branch and leaf. Carved into the sidewalk out front. Death radiating from the place I’d hidden it.

He took the hatchet and walked me deeper into the forest until we came across a fallen tree. He had spotted me from a distance… “Hey! Stop that!” How could I have missed it for so long?

I’d been in a new house for six months when I noticed it. I don’t know if I was angry or sad, if I wanted to feel detached or if I really was detached. I filled clear glass bottles with the remnants. I filled the bottles with water and screwed the caps tight. I gave the bottles as gifts. I knew I had started something I had to finish. I looked at the spot I’d been chopping. I looked back over my shoulder. I stood there and read it over and over again. I tossed it to the corner. I’ve been living with it ever since.

I wanted to carve myself a little sailboat from its bark. I was. My eyes followed the trunk all the way to its crown. Reminding me I was no-good. So I cut it down and chopped it into small pieces. Sun shining through the leaves.

The stump, dried brittle roots clinging to a clump of soil. There the remains would die and rot. Unceremoniously I dragged it from my parents’ bedroom, brought it to a small cinder block fluorescent-lit room. Wrapped in a black garbage bag.